OMGSports!

ESPN is reporting that Marlins pitcher Dontrelle Willis was arrested on suspicion of drunken driving early this morning.

"An officer saw the former NL rookie of the year stop his black Bentley in the South Beach neighborhood, get out of the car around 4:30 a.m. and urinate in the street. Miami Beach police spokesman Bobby Hernandez said the officer noticed signs of intoxication as he approached Willis, who failed a field sobriety test.

'He couldn't keep his balance, he had a strong smell of alcohol,' Hernandez said."

I like playing police officer! Let's see. Someone is driving erratically, and then pulls over and starts pissing all over the road. He also reeks of booze. Let's go with...um...jaywalking? Voter fraud? Oh, fuck, that's right! Drunken driving! That makes sense! Man, this cop shit is hard, huh?

Listen, arresting someone who stinks of alcohol while they're pissing in the road at 4 in the morning for suspicion of drunken driving is like arresting Rosie O'Donnell on suspicion of being morbidly obese. We pretty much know that for certain, don't we?

Labels: Dontrelle Willis, Drunks, MLB